Author: magdasurge

This year my son had a few surprises up his sleeve on our yearly athletics meeting. In short he made it very special for us as parents to watch. But that is not the reason for this post.

I sat there the entire day watching athletes, parents, grandparents, and siblings all being part of this event and I realized a few things.

All of them run to win, but only one gets that privilege. To win teaches you a lot, including the test of humility, because after all the hard training, it’s still a gift, unearned. Losing however, takes a big heart to survive, but when so, you build strength that cannot be taken away.

A few scenarios played off. A girl running alongside a friend, chasing the win, and then ending up being 2nd, hugging her friend at the finish line, celebrating her win. A boy beating a guy who has forever taken the win, who now celebrates his achievement of being 1st for the first time. I realized the value of sports in growing a child. The essence of life’s lessons stays the same, it’s just the gravy that changes. Same pudding, different sauce. The sooner we allow our kids to experience IT ALL, the better they are equipped to handle life. Is it nice to win the race? Of course. Is it nice to be rejected because of pride due to winning? Not so much. Is it nice to lose? No. Is it great to learn that that does not define you? YES!

We can never secure a win every time, but we can secure our heart positions. Let’s look past athletics and sports and all the fine details and realize that, in the bigger scope of things, it is a valuable practice ground for building great character! Allow them to win and lose. Allowing all emotions to be fully felt and then channeled towards the right place. Be careful not to push too hard or care too little.

Life is good. Sometimes it’s sad chaos, and then it’s great again. We are alive and privileged to experience the full package.

Love and light,

Mags

I always find myself overthinking vacations. The fact the you are supposed to rest and recharge…

Being a mom (unless you are super wealthy) going on vacation just means that you get to do all your chores at another venue. Washing, doing dishes, bedding, sweeping, cooking and more.

A few days into our latest breakaway, my husband looked at me and ask whether I am enjoying myself and whether I am ‘resting’. For a brief moment I felt worried. In the sense that time is passing by and I might not be enjoying/resting enough, and that I will look back in regret. So, I gave the answer some thought.

The meaning of rest in the dictionary and the ‘rest’ I was feeling is quite different from each other. We fall into the trap of thinking that rest is the synonym for doing nothing. For reading books and sipping on Pina coladas, ALL DAY LONG. Although this sound very nice, it is not a picture of reality (or at least not in my world).

Recharging is not only the absence of work and tasks. I gained so much ‘battery life’ just by breaking routine. Losing track of the calendar. Just staring into the ocean blue and allowing it give me peace in return for my time. Cooking dinner on a fire without fancy add-ons. Eating from my lap in the moon light under a ceiling of stars. Applying sunscreen to little faces without thinking “we’re freaking late again!”.

I read a quote that says: ‘The best things in life are the people we love, the places we’ve been and the memories we made on our way.’ Making memories and loving people provides ‘rest’. Dwelling in ‘no signal’ areas provides ‘rest’. Running into the waves, holding little hands provides ‘rest’. Sharing sun rays on the beach with a dear friend provides ‘rest’. This is the type of rest that allows us to reset, realign and regather.

May you find your ‘rest’. May you have the courage to embrace it. And may you have a tiny bit of this in every single ordinary day. Because that is what keeps us going in the in-between periods of hard work, before we get to embark on the next adventure.

Love,

Maggy

Some things in life are a discipline, it’s that simple. It is not always nice, fun or comfortable. You have to do certain things without thinking or reasoning about it.

So will it be fun to wake up at 5am and go for a walk? Maybe not, but will it grow you? Most definitely. Will you love every minute of a 10k run? Most probably not, but you will love every minute when it’s done. I can use a lot examples but I guess you get where I’m going…

I want to inspire you to establish good self discipline in your life. We too quickly let our feelings decide if we want to do something or not. We must know that not all things should be left to feelings and fun. We need to do the right things even if we don’t feel up to it. After all, we don’t go to bed with excitement to brush our teeth i the morning..

Read your Bible. Spend quiet time focusing on positive things and gratefulness. Wake up early and exercise. Be mindful of ordinary things. Enjoy life. Self discipline always empowers and rewards.

Granadilla Love,

Mags

Being a mother of 3 involves a lot of ‘I-don’t-know-either, but-lets-do-this’ moments. I’ve gathered some wisdom over time, but yet I don’t know it all. Who does? What I do know is that just by standing together we can figure it out as we go. Have you ever thought about the word GROWING UP? Growing, but upwards. How many of us grow old but we never grow, upwards? That is the thing with children…we need to guide them in growing upwards!

We would rather cover and hide them under our wings, like a mother hen, but that would not be wise. We have to walk beside them and help them endure life’s struggles. Sometimes we see it coming and other days we are caught off guard, but what matters is that you we are present.

Growth comes in different forms. While the seed is still below the ground surface you cannot see progress, but it’s happening. Only once it breaks the ground and sprouts we can ‘see’ growth. Disappointment and setbacks establish strong roots. It forms and shapes us. And only strong roots can be trusted with strong winds. Roots anchor us so that when we bloom, we can be trusted with the winds of fame and success. Stand by your child and help them grow through disappointment. And when they stand proud with achievement and medals, remind them where they come from, honoring growth. Staying humble because before you were blooming, you were rooting

Resist being frustrated and in a hurry to see flowers and proof of growth, but stay consistent with the basics and you will see colourful flowers very soon.

May you have patience with the growing pains of growing up before growing old.

Granadilla love,

Mags

Tomorrow we celebrate our mothers.
Special people whom the world could not exist without.

But like birthdays, (it’s my party, I can cry if I want to) it’s a day that goes with a lot of unmet expectations. We would never admit but we kind of hope to be rewarded, on this day, for all the sleepless nights, cold tea, and unfairness of motherhood. We want to be handled like queens with no duties only privileges. (Is that even possible) Instead, we get unsigned cards and normal mom-life in super mode.

My brother passed away many years ago. Mother’s Day is what hurts my mom so bad, still after all these years. When you speak to moms who experienced the loss of children or miscarriage, they reason that Mother’s Day is one of the most dreaded days on the calendar. I thought about this and realized that Mother’s Day needs to be seen through a different lens.

We need to honor our kids on this day. They are the reason we get to have the privilege of being a mom. That awesome feeling of holding a piece of yourself. Not caring if we have dishes to wash, nappies to change, or meals to prepare. They love us at our worst. They think we are the most beautiful women. We have them, they have us, we have each other. May you celebrate your kids tomorrow. May you hold them with a feeling of contentment. May you feel extra special knowing that you were chosen to be their mom.

Blessed Mothers Day to all moms out there. You ARE the world.

Granadilla love,

Mags

We all fight the silent, inside fight. The fight to be okay, to stay afloat. Worthy despite what the darker side of our minds tells us. We often use riches, fitness, accomplishments, and things to calculate our success. And almost every time we find ourselves falling short of our expectations.

We must fight the unknown most of the time. But through every battle we learn and become stronger. We gather skills. Some of us open up to others to help us through tougher days, others have learned that it is safer to suffer alone. When we get tired, we should rest, not quit. Some days are easy and we tend to rise with ease. Others are hard and we barely find a reason to get up.

But we need to fight with boldness and persistence. Allowing our minds to see that we were created to win…

1: Believe that you a destined for greatness. What you believe, you will become.

2: Fear is a matter of perspective. If you are great, then everything else becomes small. You are a overcomer.

3: Allow yourself to spend time in valleys, but never lose sight of the mountaintops you are striving for. Remember, the skills we learn in the valley are what we require to reach the next mountain top.

4: Spend time on positive reads, thoughts and people. Spend time away from the boundaries of your thoughts and allow the sunshine in. Spending time with God and His word works for me.

Let’s become. We are so worthy of being alive. We have purpose. We have a legacy that awaits building. Let’s do this, one day at a time. Together.

Granadilla love,

Mags

What do you see?

Eyes closed, I put you up to a chair, really close so that it touches your nose. I tell you to open your eyes and tell me everything you can from the object in front of you. You would probably say that it looks like wood, it smells like polish, it’s a bit shiny and the colour is brown. Continuing with very obvious conclusions.

Moving you about two meters away from it, asking you the same question, you would tell me a lot more about that chair. With some extensive knowledge you would even be able to tell me the year and design style too.

That’s the thing with perspective. When we find ourselves buried in confusion and stress about a situation, chances are that you are most definitely too close and not seeing it for what it is. You got to move back a little, take notes, regroup and see the whole ‘chair’. We live our lives in such a rush. We spend very little time allowing ourselves to see things from the right angle. And once you do the burden lifts. Knowledge calms the mind. When you master the power of perspective, you get control.

Allow yourself some time to reflect on the things that cause you to worry. Gather all the information about it and decide if it’s still worth stealing your joy. Often it’s just a chair waiting to be moved to the sunny corner of your mind so that you can sit on it and enjoy the view.

Granadilla love,

Mags

I’ve learned something from my neighbour. She wakes up in die morning and makes herself a cup of coffee, then she sits down at her favorite spot and do nothing but enjoy her coffee and thinks of all the things she is grateful for. When somebody talks to her during that time (which is probably 5min out of the 24hr ahead) she kindly says: Not now, I’ll speak to you when I’m done.

You see, that 5mins allows her to find herself. It sets the mood for the day ahead. A grateful heart is a positive one. We so often rush into our days. We think that 5min of extra sleep will do the trick. JUST 5 MOR MINUTES in bed, PLEASE. But the truth is, when you spend that 5min in peace and with a grateful heart, the probability of having a awesome day, despite how it might turn out, looks a lot more promising.

We always think we need a lot of time to do something valuable for ourselves. People will always tell me they don’t have time. We don’t exercise because we don’t have 1 hour free. You don’t need an hour. 15 minutes of endorphins and getting your mind off things is doing you just as good. These chemicals trigger a positive feeling in the body. 2k’s of that can make the world of a difference in how you feel. The beach body is the added value. Strength and health is the aim. You can walk, you don’t have to run. You can stretch, even do breathing exercises. There so many options. We trash the small because we think big is the only worthy effort. It’s not. It’s in the little. Start by spending 5min in peace. Make time to be mindful in the small things. When you are forced to wait at rugby practice, take 5 minutes (of your phone) and FEEL the wind on your skin. When you shop for groceries, enjoy the strength in your arms carrying those bags, pushing that trolley.

You owe it to yourself. You owe it to your children and your spouse. Stop rushing through life, feeling empty. Fill up on the small things. Be present, be aware, be grateful and be positive. Go, be good for yourself 5 minutes at a time!

Granadilla love,

Mags

I think we sometimes forget that non of all the humans walking planet earth is a finished construction job…

We shout at 3years olds as if they’ve been around 30years. Expecting they should know what we know. And yet we learn from them…everyday. I realized, lessons that is long forgotten to me, my kids still has to learn. Lessons my children passes with flying colours leaves me 10 – 0, licking my wounds. One can never say: “I have arrived’ because the moment you say that, you are still in deficit of humility. And oh boy, what a tough one to get taught.

The moment we realise how much each of us still has to learn, grace becomes a bit easier. Going into friendships knowing that neither them nor us have all the skills to make it a success, we learn to have grace. I make mistakes, but so do you. We learn. We grow. We try again. So often we take offence and make it our best friend, our teacher. We lend out our ears to it and in no time we believe everything we think. We become bitter and self-righteous.

We need to teach our kids to practice grace. I’m not implying that we should be walkovers. But freely we receive love and grace from above, and freely we ought to give it to others. Showing mercy is so empowering. It takes a strong person to forgive another. Practice this with your children and teach them to be merciful, patient and kind toward others. Some of us are only a foundation. Some two rooms and kitchen. Others are a complete double story but lack a roof. Some get broken down and slowly rebuild. Nobody’s complete. Nobody’s done, yet. We all are buildings, dreaming to look exactly like the final plan our Creator Architect drew of us.

We are neighbors, you and me, and hey, so far you look like a real masterpiece in the making. Keep it up!

Granadilla Love,

Mags